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| Written by LightningBolt of slashdot.org | |||
| Thursday, 12 May 2005 11:10 | |||
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Google, the company known primarily for its internet search engine, has announced today that it has acquired a dodgeball. Eric Schmidt, the CEO of the pioneering internet company, made the purchase at a silicon valley sporting goods superstore, Sports Authority, for the sum of $12.95.
"This acquisition will become a cornerstone of our future growth plans," said Schmidt. "In the coming weeks, this dodgeball will be hurled at tremendous speed within the executive offices. It is likely to knock phones, pen holders, and even some of those magnetic paper-clip boxes off of the desks of many employees. This should stir things up, and get our best people thinking either outside of the box, or about looking for another job. The combined one-two punch of increased thinking and lower payroll costs will propel Google forwards into the next century." Sally Jones, an employee at Sports Authority, said that the transaction went smoothly. "Initially, when we met with Schmidt, we were concerned the acquisition would be a hostile takeover. However, he assured us that his plans for the dodgeball were based on growth and solid corporate fundamentals. The fact that his credit card was not declined was also assuring." Sally says that she recommended the purchase of an air pump to help inflate it, but that Schmidt declined, stating that the company's "[value] is already inflated." The acquisition comes on the heels of rumours that Microsoft has plans to acquire a badminton set. A Microsoft spokesman was not available for comment.
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